Whatever it was, I had to face it, so I got up with heavy heart and feet, and walked towards the road, now I had to wait for him, and I was as pessimistic as I could be, since being optimistic never helps here, I had tried to follow all ‘adages’ ‘sayings’ ‘quotations’ all the time but trust me, it never works here, so better start praying and believing in miracles.
Let me introduce now who’s this monster, one whose remembrance is sufficient to make me nervous , one who has shaken my confidence 99 times and will probably make century today, accumulating all my prowess and courage let me tell it’s beyond any damn Ego, Envy, Attitude I’ve to invent a new word for him, it’s an AUTO-TUDE…
Yes! ANNA is The Man who inspired me to tremble and scribble, may god give me enough strength to remain placid throughout and provide me prowess to face him tomorrow.
I’ve never learned so many lessons in life by a single phenomenon and still feel that I’m novice , everyday he challenges my self-esteem and I can’t help but promise myself to win tomorrow , still waiting for that tomorrow to come, meanwhile learned many lessons and would like to share :
AUTOP 10:
Learning 1: Follow the Stream
Never ever think that you can go where you want to go, Means will justify Ends here, if most no. of Autos are going south and you want to go north, go South and gently ask to take a U-Turn after going a Km or so, depending on Anna’s mood and convenience, else find another Auto…
After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Learning 2: Always Keep 4 Alternatives:
Till now you would have realized you can’t go exactly where you want to go, still rephrasing helps sometimes, after asking 2 autos for same destination just change the landmark and wait for miracle to happen, it works many times , but not always… After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Learning 3: Last in First Out:
Our common tendency is if there are more than one Auto-Hunters we tend to stand first in queue, so that we can catch the early bird, but it’ll never work, just stand 200Mtrs away from the bunch and you’ll find Anna saying ‘Alwa’ to everybody and coming to you… After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Learning 4: Always Be Polite:
Never ever think about overpowering this creature you’ll end up souring your feet, by walking and walking and walking, being Polite is Better, compared to bagging later, and never ever forget to Thank Anna and God if you’re lucky enough to get an auto.
After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Learning 5: Sky Isn’t the Limit:
Days are gone when we used to say “be prepared for the worst and hope for the Best”, you can never be rich enough to pay them, fares can skyrocket depending on your urgency, and their mood, and at that point of time you’ll look stupid if you even look at the meter… After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Learning 6: You Brag they Beg:
Never showoff even if you’re rich enough lest pay hefty sum, if you’re a software engineer keep your badge in pocket, if you’re carrying luggage peel-off airport seal, if you’re going to airport take two autos and divide the distance, don’t be surprised when they ask for extra 20-30 Rs. since you’re a software engineer and they’ll justify this by saying “whatt sarrr!!!You earn in millions and bargaining for 20-30!!!”… After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Learning 7: Something is better than nothing:
If you’re lucky enough to get into an Auto you’ve won half battle , now don’t be so greedy to reach the destination peacefully, so be ready to get down at (n-1/2/3)Th distance from your starting point, still never forget to be thankful to Anna if you’re looking for other Auto,
After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Learning 8: Everyone Bows head here:
If you think Barber shop is the only place where everyone has to bow his/her head, you’re wrong, irrespective of cast, creed, community, ethnicity, health ,wealth, everyone has bowed head here, even if for getting into an Auto…
After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Learning 9: √T=M
T=Time, M=Money, If you consider ‘Time is Money’ a mere saying, you’ll see it conceptualizing here, waiting time will be charged, and if you think you’re very smart by knowing that fare is 1.5 times after 9:00PM IST just adjust your watch according to 9:00PM AST (Auto Standard Time) and it may vary from 30 minutes to 1 hr…. After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Learning 10: Learn, Unlearn, And Relearn:
Learning and relearning is the only way to get better, so keep learning and sharpening your skills,
After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!
Word that starts from ‘I’ but comes before ‘H’…
The word that you’ll never find in IE or Mozilla…
AUTO-TUDE says ‘Houda (yes)’ comes far after ‘ILLA (NO)’
Rupak.
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4 comments:
Nice & funny one.... most part of it is true mate....
Each and every word in the article is my feeling and for no surprise its coming from my beloved's Keypads. If any body asks me why don't I go and join any company in IT City B'lore, If my MGR asks seeks my approval for trasferring me to B'lore....always my answer is a Big NOOOOO. And apart from couple of other reasons....the one and foremost is my Auto-Tude Problem. Sorry ANNAs of B'lore I don't earn much to serve u for rest of my life.
I hate u Guyzz to the tee....and Mr. Rupak I love and respect ur writings as never before. Boy....u keep on spurring and inspiring me on.
Excellent write-up....
keep up the gud work dude.... Miles to go for u ( in Writing re....not in AUTO :) )
full marks for innovative article...am also scared of these auto-wallahas....bangy is costly coz of this....lemme earn a million, I will be there....
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