Monday, March 23, 2009

Bi-Psyche-A-Trick:Transition of Psyche

“…It was the third consecutive day when I had to face him …dawn was about to break, and this time I’ll break too, hat-trick of insult!...Am I that bad? I decided not to face him, and other moment I thought… Am I coward too?? No I’m not!! He was coming towards me faster and faster and I was gearing up, entire surrounding was seemingly in slow motion and I could clearly feel some scary background music that’s usually played in climax fight scene of Indian movies, and when he was few meters opposite to me I felt a pin-drop silence…he bypassed me …I felt the famous (notorious) cut in back wheel of my bicycle, and the miracle happened!!! Yes I was still riding my bike and he fell down this time!!”

I was very happy that day, my new bicycle had arrived. I must have been 8 or 9 that time. My father promised me that he will start my training from the next day. Those days, “early morning” used to be 4:00 am. Even in summers, you could feel the winter in those couple of hours. As planned, by 4:30 am we both were out; I sat behind on my new bicycle and my father drove me to the ground - a big college ground where most of the athletes and IPS officers from my town had done their initial 100 laps. I enjoyed the chirping of the birds and the cool breeze hitting my sleepy face. So, it was day one of my training! I was learning how to paddle 360 degree without looking down, my father held the bicycle and my job was to give it momentum. It was my first encounter with that nasty fellow, somehow I felt those negative waves. He was performing stunts on his bike and I was yet to balance mine… He tried a few tricks and then bypassed me hitting the rear wheel of my bike and the very next moment, I was on ground with my leg stuck somewhere in my bike! My father helped me to get up as he had already left my bike without telling me; and I did ride a few meters without noticing that!! Gruesome first day and the same happened on other day too though this time I was a bit alert so didn’t hurt myself that bad. and then the miracle happened on third day!! I had learnt bicycle!

There are a few MUSTs for a human life, learning bicycle is one of them and once learnt, you never forget it again. The way my father taught this to me left a lasting impact on my life. The way he overpowered my psyche with the trick of releasing his hand without telling me, injected confidence in me, and whenever I master or at least learn to do a new thing, I feel my father is waving at me as I paddle ahead. I would like to call this trick of bicycle: Bi-psyche-a-trick.

Progressing in life is all about LUR (Learn-Unlearn-Relearn), and we encounter many such nasty bicyclists in every walk of life; uninvited but harmful, jubilant but jealous, talented but tricky, and sometimes venomous! Once you master in their field, they’ll not scare you…so being determined, focused and shameless works here. As we grow up we face bi-psyche-a-trick few often, as then it becomes cut- throat competition. You hold your bike and you release, as there is no one who’ll stand behind to wave and watch you paddle ahead.

Like we all graduate from same college but do different things in life, some go for Government jobs, some opt Private one, some start their venture and some do nothing but dream, similarly there're different kind of human behaviors after learning balancing skills, some people become Mentor, they want to share their two scents with others to bring them to same level, and there're few who're Secretive, secretive people try and hide their skills to remain important in society, they act stupid to escape from knowledge sharing, it makes them over-protective, third category is Parasites, Parasites always want support, they'll stick to you like a leech and suck all knowledge from you, amongst parasites too there're two sub categories (1) Those who remain grateful to you and owe the credit to their mentor (2) Those who grasp last drop of blood from you and kick you aside.

I won't favor any particular category as all are correct in their perspective, though I would prefer to have flavor of all three unless it make a deadly cocktail.

I’ve learned to ride on two wheels,

And now feel, these aren’t big deals,

I’ve been pedaling since I learned it,

And that’s the way I’ve earned it,

No ideas to steal, no credits to conceal,

Rotate wheel, I’ve desires to reveal.


Monday, February 23, 2009

Juggernaut of Judge-Err-Knot

I was en-route my Office, hurriedly I picked up my things and started running, there were obstacles… traffic-jam was longer than usual; passing it, I realized oh! I forgot to lock the door!! Ignoring it I went ahead and discovered I’m in pajamas!! Ignoring that too I ran faster, I was able to see office building, and it was 13 past 9 of the AM, 10 more steps and I could have swiped my card I put my hand in front pocket of my bag!!!...and that’s it!!

I forgot my ID card!!! I ran towards security gate to register my attendance and there was a queue, 14 past 9!!! 6...5…4...3...2...1…0.trinnnnnnn!!! Cacophonic hooter rang and I got up in aghast, I was sweating as if I have run 10s of miles, I turned-off the alarm, it was 6:30 AM, yes!!It was a nightmare!!

Thank fully I was able to make it on time, there was a long queue In cafeteria, I silently stood behind some other Tea-aspirants, long queue reminded me about my nightmare, my ears couldn’t stop overhearing ,there were opinions, For and Against, Debates and Arguments, Calm and Outrageous , and there were concerns for oneself and organization , and there was consensus, when it came to discuss about organization, all had one voice, all were truly concerned about making Organization a better place to work, Profitable and The #1 , ‘Means’ were different ‘End’ was the same.

I realized time has changed, we’ve started discussing ( add more sophistication), instead of accepting and following, and we’ve started Judging, we’re judging day and night, ourselves and others,

We’re judging politics and business, TV shows!! (Most of the time) all have become experts, be it singing, dancing or comedy show, we’re judging, one poor participant faces two billion eyes and 100 billion expert comments , Juggernaut of opinions walks over his/her attempts and trample originality in order to level them with Judge’s prejudice, aren’t we cruel sometimes? A wrong judgment and some body’s career on stake! We Judge! We Err!! We Knot!!! Judge(v)-Err(v)-Knot(v)!!! Juggernaut of high expectations creating Judge-Err-Knot!

There’s a bit of Javed Akhtar in every soul, it makes us feel intellectual, we broaden our eye pupils, we lean and make all possible postures to Judge, to look expert, to decide, and then we send SMS and smile …what an idea sirJi!!!

So is that wrong being Javed-istic?? Isn’t that real democracy...? And there are opinions-For and Against, Debates and Arguments, Calm and Outrageous…but this time ‘no consensus’ because this time it’s ‘ME’ who’d be proven wrong if I accept and “I can never be wrong! I’m expert that’s why I Judge!!And I Judge The Best!!I’m not who Judge-Err-Knot!!!”

This is the Third time Boy asked me: What sir?? And person behind me nudged me, I asked for Tea, and went un-judged to my place, crossing queue of Judges they were happy and confident about not Judge-Err-knot(ing):

I also make postures and try to judge,

Decide to be ‘rational’ and to negate Grudge,

I return unnoticed, Dawdled and distraught,

And think, am I the Victim of Judge-err-knot?


Thursday, January 22, 2009


I dumped my bag aside, performed few rituals i.e. checking mails, responding a few, some follow-ups ,and now started looking around ,after few Hi ! Hello!! and artificial smiles I visited neighboring Cubicle to discuss some unplanned yet serious discussion, with detailed analysis we Quibbled each and every aspect of that unplanned topic and then departed with an unsaid promise to discuss something else next time, I wonder sometime which kind of waves are these ?? waves that come in coherence simultaneously and make few spectrum of thoughts, Darwin (or someone ) says this is 'Adaptability'(...some keywords are floating around my mind like a ring 'existence' ' fittest' 'survival' 'theory') in random order what kind of curiosity is this , to know the unknown, to discuss the unplanned, to conclude The Undecided, Curiosity between the Cubicles!! ...Wait a minute...better word...CUBIO-SITY!!

…so Darwin(or someone) meant to say socializing is in human nature, gossips are like Prohibited things (drink, smoke, too much spicy food, and banned movies ) more you suppress more you'll urge to experiment, When Cubicles were not there , there used to be chairs and tables, you had little to show-off and The-few was anyway exposed, Lunch boxes used to be identical and shared, discussion at 'Paanwala Shop' with 'Cutting Tea' and smoker’s formula was : Puffs/head = (cigarette /no. of participants), topics used to be family, kids, holiday plans, and sometime trivial like servant or electricity...time changed , we became sophisticated but estranged, we started having many things to hide and few to share, shareable were gaudy in-fact more to show less to share, i.e. latest model of cell phone, one time offer to drop to nearest bus stop in one's newly purchased car, discussion about the pub where someone visited Yester-night and spent big bucks, Family, Kids, electricity , servant...c’mon everyone has it !

Competition!! Intense.., Brutal...Throat Cut, where's the place to face your neighbors? Or to show him/her your face, Cubicles were built physically around our pre-built preoccupations,

Darwin (or someone) smiled...”See!! I told you naa!!”

Now we walk with cubicles around us, with a restricted Cubio-Sity, each one has their personnel space, we're fixed on moveable plots, taking our spaces with us, formality is new etiquette lots of unwritten worldwide accepted rules, make us odd-man out if we don't follow them, better stay in your cubicle, Migrated generation is living with this migraine, they're nostalgic but fascinated, know lots of customs but want to customize them, ambitious and amicable, revolutionary and adaptable, standing against odd but dithered to take any stand, I see gaudy costumes and dull faces in parties, 6 inch smile on Mute mode, laughter doesn't come out of cubicles,

Darwin (or someone) smiled...”See!! I told you naa!!”

Let sophistication be Art of Living, let Cubicles be around us, until Cubio-Sity meets a boundary-less curiosity ,let frustration rest in peace!!

Cubio-Sity is all about:

More to know less to share,

Less to watch more to stare,

More to utter less to discuss,

Less to Console more to Fuss,


Sunday, November 2, 2008

It’s All About AUTO-TUDE! :The AUTOP-10

Oh …*%#@ again late!! All plans have to be reworked, my heart started pumping like a punching bag, Skepticism, Frustration, Uncertainty, Anger, Fear, all at a time were getting on my nerves, as if someone is making Bhel-Poori of emotions in basket of my brain.

Whatever it was, I had to face it, so I got up with heavy heart and feet, and walked towards the road, now I had to wait for him, and I was as pessimistic as I could be, since being optimistic never helps here, I had tried to follow all ‘adages’ ‘sayings’ ‘quotations’ all the time but trust me, it never works here, so better start praying and believing in miracles.

Let me introduce now who’s this monster, one whose remembrance is sufficient to make me nervous , one who has shaken my confidence 99 times and will probably make century today, accumulating all my prowess and courage let me tell it’s beyond any damn Ego, Envy, Attitude I’ve to invent a new word for him, it’s an AUTO-TUDE…

Yes! ANNA is The Man who inspired me to tremble and scribble, may god give me enough strength to remain placid throughout and provide me prowess to face him tomorrow.

I’ve never learned so many lessons in life by a single phenomenon and still feel that I’m novice , everyday he challenges my self-esteem and I can’t help but promise myself to win tomorrow , still waiting for that tomorrow to come, meanwhile learned many lessons and would like to share :


Learning 1: Follow the Stream

Never ever think that you can go where you want to go, Means will justify Ends here, if most no. of Autos are going south and you want to go north, go South and gently ask to take a U-Turn after going a Km or so, depending on Anna’s mood and convenience, else find another Auto…

After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Learning 2: Always Keep 4 Alternatives:

Till now you would have realized you can’t go exactly where you want to go, still rephrasing helps sometimes, after asking 2 autos for same destination just change the landmark and wait for miracle to happen, it works many times , but not always… After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Learning 3: Last in First Out:

Our common tendency is if there are more than one Auto-Hunters we tend to stand first in queue, so that we can catch the early bird, but it’ll never work, just stand 200Mtrs away from the bunch and you’ll find Anna saying ‘Alwa’ to everybody and coming to you… After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Learning 4: Always Be Polite:

Never ever think about overpowering this creature you’ll end up souring your feet, by walking and walking and walking, being Polite is Better, compared to bagging later, and never ever forget to Thank Anna and God if you’re lucky enough to get an auto.

After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Learning 5: Sky Isn’t the Limit:

Days are gone when we used to say “be prepared for the worst and hope for the Best”, you can never be rich enough to pay them, fares can skyrocket depending on your urgency, and their mood, and at that point of time you’ll look stupid if you even look at the meter… After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Learning 6: You Brag they Beg:

Never showoff even if you’re rich enough lest pay hefty sum, if you’re a software engineer keep your badge in pocket, if you’re carrying luggage peel-off airport seal, if you’re going to airport take two autos and divide the distance, don’t be surprised when they ask for extra 20-30 Rs. since you’re a software engineer and they’ll justify this by saying “whatt sarrr!!!You earn in millions and bargaining for 20-30!!!”After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Learning 7: Something is better than nothing:

If you’re lucky enough to get into an Auto you’ve won half battle , now don’t be so greedy to reach the destination peacefully, so be ready to get down at (n-1/2/3)Th distance from your starting point, still never forget to be thankful to Anna if you’re looking for other Auto,

After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Learning 8: Everyone Bows head here:

If you think Barber shop is the only place where everyone has to bow his/her head, you’re wrong, irrespective of cast, creed, community, ethnicity, health ,wealth, everyone has bowed head here, even if for getting into an Auto…

After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Learning 9: √T=M

T=Time, M=Money, If you consider ‘Time is Money’ a mere saying, you’ll see it conceptualizing here, waiting time will be charged, and if you think you’re very smart by knowing that fare is 1.5 times after 9:00PM IST just adjust your watch according to 9:00PM AST (Auto Standard Time) and it may vary from 30 minutes to 1 hr…. After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Learning 10: Learn, Unlearn, And Relearn:

Learning and relearning is the only way to get better, so keep learning and sharpening your skills,

After -all it’s all About AUTO-TUDE!

Word that starts from ‘I’ but comes before ‘H’…

The word that you’ll never find in IE or Mozilla…

AUTO-TUDE says ‘Houda (yes)’ comes far after ‘ILLA (NO)’